“Davisms” I find myself saying frequently are:
Negative isn’t the only truth.
AND
Keep the baby in with the bathwater.
First, “Negative isn’t the only truth.” Oftentimes we focus intently on what we do wrong and have DONE wrong since the dawn of time. A belief can set in that because our fudge ups are true they, therefore, with chronic, emotional focus, become the ONLY truth.
There’s a part of the psyche that realizes our mistakes are, in fact, true and factual. Yes, they are. But in totality they are only a part, usually small, of who we are as a whole person. We all do good things frequently. Maybe we don’t deserve big awards for most of our daily good but doing the basic, boring, “get it done” things required of earthly living are good nonetheless.
So take the good and give yourself credit for the good you do. Focus more on the good you do and realize that the fudge ups you make aren’t the only truth.
Keep the Baby in With the Bathwater
Next, “Keep the baby in with the bathwater.” You know what? I’m just going to call you out – right here and now. Ready?
You are selfish. Your breath stinks in the morning. You look like 40 miles of bad road when you first awaken. You are NEVER going to make the cover of Men’s Health or Shape magazine — you JUST don’t have the goods to be a cover model. You speak with a foul tongue, in anger, in hurtful ways to people who love you and who you love. You could be or could have BEEN a better parent. You take people you love for granted and you are WAY too unappreciative for what you have in your life. In many ways your humanity, if it were to become public to the world, would feel downright embarrassing and shameful. You are human – therefore PARTS OF YOU SUCK!!
For my Christians out there you know these sucky parts of you as sin. And for my Christians you KNOW for a fact that you are, at times, the biggest hypocrite walking earth for how judgmental you are. You pick and choose which parts of the Bible you want to pay attention to. How you behave in private, at times, is the polar opposite of what you believe in your heart and have in your God-filled mind. Get real. You, at times, SUCK as a Christian!!
So how are you feeling right now? Pretty good?!
But listen, don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. The clean “baby” is your positive attributes, good qualities and strengths. The dirty “bathwater” is your flaws, faults and mistakes.
The fact that you are flawed as a human, sinful as a Christian, and that you fudge up something pretty much daily doesn’t mean that you, as a whole, are a fudge up. Keep the baby (positives) in with the bathwater (negatives).
Parts of you suck. But all parts of you don’t suck. And you do far far far more good than bad, far more positive than negative.
So remember that you will fudge up but you aren’t a fudge up because this is true. Even though your fudge ups are negative this isn’t the ONLY truth. Keep the baby in with the bathwater and focus more often on the other truths — your positives, good qualities and things you do well and right on a daily basis. Give yourself credit for the good while you evaluate mistakes for the purpose of correction — not for the purpose of self-punishment or downright self-abuse.
Flawed, imperfect and still a good person,
David Greenwalt – Founder
Certified Wellness Coach (ACSM)
Leanness Lifestyle University